Tomorrow I Turn 30. Kill Me Now. No, Please Don’t Kill Me.

There I said it, I’m 30. Irene, you’re 30. I know, how did I get here? Who did this to me? The person who made up the whole 30 is the new 20 is an asshole. 30 is 30. Leave it at that. I never hear anyone say 20 is the new 10. It’s a made up line used to make old people feel better. Now I’m older and I have to face the (no more clubbing) music. I’ll be fine. I mean, I still feel 25, hoping I look 22. Turning 30 is something you think only happens to other people. Like a disease. Like somehow you think if you take all your vitamins and exercise and eat healthy, the turning 30 disease will skip you. It’s the reaffirmation that we do indeed become older. And I’m slowly accepting I’m okay with that.

To my twenties, I loved you. I’m going to miss you. You’ve been a part of my life for so long and now I’m never going to see you again. We had a lot of fun together. But it’s time to move on and I’m going to remember the hell out of you. You taught me a lot about myself and my thirties will teach me even more and they’ll make me feel a lot more comfortable about being me.

I’m trying hard not to feel old, but rather experienced. I’m only relatively old. Like to a five year old. To TH’s 92 year old grandma I practically just started walking. I should feel so lucky to get to live three times my age. I feel like I just sort of started to figure it all out, so really this is the beginning. I’ve got fears to overcome, cities to explore, people to meet and plenty of blog posts to write.

I’m going to stop myself before I get way cheesy with it.

Here’s me on my first birthday.

Where apparently I only had one guest and my brother was back there trying to open my presents. Who brought the Easter basket?

Then I turned five and was caught eating my hand.

Hey look, more people at this party. That’s my BCF next to me.

Yeah, then things got awkward after this. I was funky looking up until, like, now.

But hey, thank you twenties for letting me experiment with looks that didn’t quite work and molding me into the woman I am now.

Thirties, it’s good to meet you. Be nice to me. If my math is right, we’ve got ten years of each other. Let’s make it work.



  1. May 11, 2012

    Happy early birthday Irene! I’m 40 and still fist pumping to house music on my way to work and still dance the night away…so keep working it girl! You are going to LOVE your dirty thirties :)…so let your hair down and get filthy. xo-Barb

  2. May 11, 2012

    Haha you with a party hat & me looking all high. Classic! Can’t wait to celebrate with you BCF!

    • May 11, 2012

      Just realized it looks like you’re smoking a joint. Good times.

  3. May 11, 2012

    so sweet- I must be hormonal because your childhood pics brought a tear to my eye. It’s been amazing watching you grow into the woman you’ve become & personally I think women get hotter in their thirties. Twenties, ok I get it, we’re like effortlessly super thin and can drink all night and still look great the next morning, but let’s face it we’re stupid. Thirties- not so much & still hot. You did the twenty-something beautifully & I’m glad you beat me to the 30 punch so you can help me when it’s my turn <3 Happy Almost Birthday!

  4. Happy Birthday Girl! I know exactly how you feel. Just celebrate though… that’s all you can do. Here’s to a decade of awesome!

  5. oh my goodness – i didnt know we were so close in age– its probably because i, too, feel 25. strike that, i told someone just this morning,i still feel 21. except the day AFTER a hard night. then i feel 30. i just turned the big 30 in march, and its been great i think? i didnt care too much as it happened. i think this is when people will start taking me (us?) seriously. so it might be good. i just need to ensure to do a few things to keep looking like im in my 20’s – ie: stop drinking so much… i’ll start to look rode hard/put up wet, remember to always wash my face at night… (HARDEST ONE) and to still wear funky nail polish. Hoping those things keep us young and not RHowhateverthehellcity young 🙂

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! You are beautiful and young and fun.

  6. May 11, 2012

    OMGGG!! One guest and an easter basket~! hahahaha!! Now I know what to get you for your birthday!! Can’t wait to see you and celebrate the amazingness that is… well… YOU! 🙂 <3

  7. May 11, 2012

    How many more years until we’re officially cougars? That is going to be a scary day my friend. 30 is nothing, although I might be singing a different tune next year when it’s my turn. Happy birthday! Let’s get drunk together next month okay?!

  8. May 11, 2012

    I love this post! I think it’s one of my most favorite ever (and yes, I’m totally counting the one that I *gasp* appeared in). Happy early birthday Irene! You.are.awesome 🙂

    • May 11, 2012


  9. May 11, 2012

    Oh my god, I laughed like an asshole reading this. Out loud…in public. I totes remember that My Little Pony party.

    • May 11, 2012

      You should remember. You and Erica used my makeup kit given to me by Uncle Raul.

  10. May 11, 2012

    I have no doubt your thirties will bring amazing things! Happy Birthday!!

  11. May 12, 2012

    Happy Birthday Irene!! You don’t look a day over five. Really. You haven’t changed much since that adorable picture…only now you have a rockin bod and cuter shoes.

  12. May 12, 2012

    Bummed I missed it — happy belated!! Hope you celebrated properly last night and are a weensy bit hungover today ;0)

    For the record, the 30’s are WAY better! Trust me on this!

  13. May 12, 2012

    Babe, tonight is going to be awesome and so are your thirties. Welcome to the club. . .literally! Love you. HB from TH!

  14. May 12, 2012

    Happy Birthday to the coolest and most stylish blogger I know! I know how you feel about the 30th…I had mine last year…it was a little bit of a hard pill to swallow (and I didn’t think it would be!) just because of all the stigmas and expectations that come with being in your thirties. It feels like a lot of pressure that I didn’t particularly *want* (c: But funny enough, I’m still me (shocker), and it really didn’t matter at all and I still get peeps telling me I don’t look thirty at all, so CHEERS to your 30’s and may you have many an incident of being carded this weekend (c;

  15. May 12, 2012

    Happy Birthday!!! I hope you celebrate it right! And I’m sure your 30s will be the best decade yet 🙂

  16. Happy Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!! If 20 is the new 10, then I’m about to turn 18. Ehhh…no thanks. But in two years, maybe I’ll feel differently.

    Hope your party was fabulous this weekend!

  17. I wanna see pics from your birthday!!!!

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